[夜与日].(night.and.day).(英)弗吉尼亚·伍尔芙.文字版- 第78部分

He　nodded；　and　took　his　pipe　from　his　mouth；　but；　
being　unable　to　think　of　anything　to　say；　he　put　it　back　
again；　although　he　would　have　been　glad　if　she　had　
stayed。　

Against　her　wish；　Mary　insisted　upon　taking　her　downstairs；　
and　then；　as　there　was　no　cab　to　be　seen；　they　
stood　in　the　street　together；　looking　about　them。　

“Go　back；”　Katharine　urged　her；　thinking　of　Mr。　Bast　
with　his　papers　in　his　hand。　

“You　can’t　wander　about　the　streets　alone　in　those　
clothes；”　said　Mary；　but　the　desire　to　find　a　cab　was　not　
her　true　reason　for　standing　beside　Katharine　for　a　minute　
or　two。　Unfortunately　for　her　posure；　Mr。　Bast　and　

his　papers　seemed　to　her　an　incidental　diversion　of　life’s　
serious　purpose　pared　with　some　tremendous　fact　
which　manifested　itself　as　she　stood　alone　with　Katharine。　
It　may　have　been　their　mon　womanhood。　

“Have　you　seen　Ralph？”　she　asked　suddenly；　without　
preface。　

“Yes；”　said　Katharine　directly；　but　she　did　not　remember　
when　or　where　she　had　seen　him。　It　took　her　a　moment　
or　two　to　remember　why　Mary　should　ask　her　if　she　
had　seen　Ralph。　

“I　believe　I’m　jealous；”　said　Mary。　

“Nonsense；　Mary；”　said　Katharine；　rather　distractedly；　
taking　her　arm　and　beginning　to　walk　up　the　street　in　the　
direction　of　the　main　road。　“Let　me　see；　we　went　to　Kew；　
and　we　agreed　to　be　friends。　Yes；　that’s　what　happened。”　
Mary　was　silent；　in　the　hope　that　Katharine　would　tell　
her　more。　But　Katharine　said　nothing。　

“It’s　not　a　question　of　friendship；”　Mary　exclaimed；　her　
anger　rising；　to　her　own　surprise。　“You　know　it’s　not。　How　
can　it　be？　I’ve　no　right　to　interfere—”　She　stopped。　“Only　
I’d　rather　Ralph　wasn’t　hurt；”　she　concluded。　

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“I　think　he　seems　able　to　take　care　of　himself；”　Katharine　
observed。　Without　either　of　them　wishing　it；　a　feeling　of　
hostility　had　risen　between　them。　

“Do　you　really　think　it’s　worth　it？”　said　Mary；　after　a　
pause。　

“How　can　one　tell？”　Katharine　asked。　

“Have　you　ever　cared　for　any　one？”　Mary　demanded　
rashly　and　foolishly。　

“I　can’t　wander　about　London　discussing　my　feelings—　
Here’s　a　cab—no；　there’s　some　one　in　it。”　

“We　don’t　want　to　quarrel；”　said　Mary。　

“Ought　I　to　have　told　him　that　I　wouldn’t　be　his　friend？”　
Katharine　asked。　“Shall　I　tell　him　that？　If　so；　what　reason　
shall　I　give　him？”　

“Of　course　you　can’t　tell　him　that；”　said　Mary；　controlling　
herself。　

“I　believe　I　shall；　though；”　said　Katharine　suddenly。　

“I　lost　my　temper；　Katharine；　I　shouldn’t　have　said　what　
I　did。”　

“The　whole　thing’s　foolish；”　said　Katharine；　peremptorily。　
“That’s　what　I　say。　It’s　not　worth　it。”　She　spoke　with　

unnecessary　vehemence；　but　it　was　not　directed　against　
Mary　Datchet。　Their　animosity　had　pletely　disappeared；　
and　upon　both　of　them　a　cloud　of　difficulty　and　darkness　
rested；　obscuring　the　future；　in　which　they　had　both　to　
find　a　way。　

“No；　no；　it’s　not　worth　it；”　Katharine　repeated。　“Suppose；　
as　you　say；　it’s　out　of　the　question—this　friendship；　
he　falls　in　love　with　me。　I　don’t　want　that。　Still；”　
she　added；　“I　believe　you　exaggerate；　love’s　not　everything；　
marriage　itself　is　only　one　of　the　things—”　They　
had　reached　the　main　thoroughfare；　and　stood　looking　at　
the　omnibuses　and　passersby；　who　seemed；　for　the　moment；　
to　illustrate　what　Katharine　had　said　of　the　diversity　
of　human　interests。　For　both　of　them　it　had　bee　
one　of　those　moments　of　extreme　detachment；　when　it　
seems　unnecessary　ever　again　to　shoulder　the　burden　of　
happiness　and　selfassertive　existence。　Their　neighbors　
were　wele　to　their　possessions。　

“I　don’t　lay　down　any　rules；”’　said　Mary；　recovering　herself　
first；　as　they　turned　after　a　long　pause　of　this　description。　
“All　I　say　is　that　you　should　know　what　you’re　

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about—for　certain；　but；”　she　added；　“I　expect　you　do。”　

At　the　same　time　she　was　profoundly　perplexed；　not　
only　by　what　she　knew　of　the　arrangements　for　Katharine’s　
marriage；　but　by　the　impression　which　she　had　of　her；　
there　on　her　arm；　dark　and　inscrutable。　

They　walked　back　again　and　reached　the　steps　which　
led　up　to　Mary’s　flat。　Here　they　stopped　and　paused　for　a　
moment；　saying　nothing。　

“You　must　go　in；”　said　Katharine；　rousing　herself。　“He’s　
waiting　all　this　time　to　go　on　with　his　reading。”　She　
glanced　up　at　the　lighted　window　near　the　top　of　the　
house；　and　they　both　looked　at　it　and　waited　for　a　moment。　
A　flight　of　semicircular　steps　ran　up　to　the　hall；　
and　Mary　slowly　mounted　the　first　two　or　three；　and　
paused；　looking　down　upon　Katharine。　

“I　think　you　underrate　the　value　of　that　emotion；”　she　
said　slowly；　and　a　little　awkwardly。　She　climbed　another　
step　and　looked　down　once　more　upon　the　figure　that　
was　only　partly　lit　up；　standing　in　the　street　with　a　colorless　
face　turned　upwards。　As　Mary　hesitated；　a　cab　came　
by　and　Katharine　turned　and　stopped　it；　saying　as　she　

opened　the　door：　

“Remember；　I　want　to　belong　to　your　society—remember；”　
she　added；　having　to　raise　her　voice　a　little；　and　
shutting　the　door　upon　the　rest　of　her　words。　

Mary　mounted　the　stairs　step　by　step；　as　if　she　had　to　
lift　her　body　up　an　extremely　steep　ascent。　She　had　had　
to　wrench　herself　forcibly　away　from　Katharine；　and　every　
step　vanquished　her　desire。　She　held　on　grimly；　encouraging　
herself　as　though　she　were　actually　making　
some　great　physical　effort　in　climbing　a　height。　She　was　
conscious　that　Mr。　Bast；　sitting　at　the　top　of　the　stairs　
with　his　documents；　offered　her　solid　footing　if　she　were　
capable　of　reaching　it。　The　knowledge　gave　her　a　faint　
sense　of　exaltation。　

Mr。　Bast　raised　his　eyes　as　she　opened　the　door。　

“I’ll　go　on　where　I　left　off；”　he　said。　“Stop　me　if　you　
want　anything　explained。”　

He　had　been　rereading　the　document；　and　making　pencil　
notes　in　the　margin　while　he　waited；　and　he　went　on　
again　as　if　there　had　been　no　interruption。　Mary　sat　down　
among　the　flat　cushions；　lit　another　cigarette；　and　lis


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tened　with　a　frown　upon　her　face。　

Katharine　leant　back　in　the　corner　of　the　cab　that　carried　
her　to　Chelsea；　conscious　of　fatigue；　and　conscious；　
too；　of　the　sober　and　satisfactory　nature　of　such　industry　
as　she　had　just　witnessed。　The　thought　of　it　posed　
and　calmed　her。　When　she　reached　home　she　let　herself　
in　as　quietly　as　she　could；　in　the　hope　that　the　household　
was　already　gone　to　bed。　But　her　excursion　had　occupied　
less　time　than　she　thought；　and　she　heard　sounds　
of　unmistakable　liveliness　upstairs。　A　door　opened；　and　
she　drew　herself　into　a　groundfloor　room　in　case　the　
sound　meant　that　Mr。　Peyton　were　taking　his　leave。　From　
where　she　stood　she　could　see　the　stairs；　though　she　was　
herself　invisible。　Some　one　was　ing　down　the　stairs；　
and　now　she　saw　that　it　was　William　Rodney。　He　looked　a　
little　strange；　as　if　he　were　walking　in　his　sleep；　his　lips　
moved　as　if　he　were　acting　some　part　to　himself。　He　came　
down　very　slowly；　step　by　step；　with　one　hand　upon　the　
banisters　to　guide　himself。　She　thought　he　looked　as　if　
he　were　in　some　mood　of　high　exaltation；　which　it　made　
her　unfortable　to　witness　any　longer　unseen。　She　

stepped　into　the　hall。　He　gave　a　great　start　upon　seeing　

her　and　stopped。　

“Katharine！”　he　exclaimed。　“You’ve　been　out？”　he　asked。　

“Yes…　。　Are　they　still　up？”　

He　did　not　answer；　and　walked　into　the　groundfloor　
room　through　the　door　which　stood　open。　

“It’s　been　more　wonderful　than　I　can　tell　you；”　he　said；　
“I’m　incredibly　happy—”　

He　was　scarcely　addressing　her；　and　she　said　nothing。　
For　a　moment　they　stood　at　opposite　sides　of　a　table　
saying　nothing。　Then　he　asked　her　quickly；　“But　tell　me；　
how　did　it　seem　to　you？　What　did　you　think；　Katharine？　
Is　there　a　chance　that　she　likes　me？　Tell　me；　Katharine！”　

Before　she　could　answer　a　door　opened　on　the　landing　
above　and　disturbed　them。　It　disturbed　William　excessively。　
He　started　back；　walked　rapidly　into　the　hall；　and　
said　in　a　loud　and　ostentatiously　ordinary　tone：　

“Good　night；　Katharine。　Go　to　bed　now。　I　shall　see　you　
soon。　I　hope　I　shall　be　able　to　e　tomorrow。”　

Next　moment　he　was　gone。　She　went　upstairs　and　found　
Cassandra　on　the　landing。　She　held　two　or　three　books　in　

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her　hand；　and　she　was　stooping　to　look　at　others　in　a　
little　bookcase。　She　said　that　she　could　never　tell　which　
book　she　wanted　to　read　in　bed；　poetry；　biography；　or　
metaphysics。　

“What　do　you　read　in　bed；　Katharine？”　she　asked；　as　
they　walked　upstairs　side　by　side。　

“Sometimes　one　thing—sometimes　another；”　said　
Katharine　vaguely。　Cassandra　looked　at　her。　

“D’you　know；　you’re　extraordinarily　queer；”　she　said。　“Every　
one　seems　to　me　a　little　queer。　Perhaps　it’s　the　effect　
of　London。”　

“Is　William　queer；　too？”　Katharine　asked。　

“Well；　I　think　he　is　a　little；”　Cassandra　replied。　“Queer；　
but　very　fascinating。　I　shall　read　Milton　tonight。　It’s　
been　one　of　the　happiest