ard。’
He shrugged as he pulled the grass off his finger。 ‘Well； it was the least I could do to make up for what I did。’
‘For what you did？’
Richard occupied himself with carefully rolling his pants back down。 ‘Well； before I saved you； I kind of killed you。’
She leaned closer。 ‘You did what？’
‘You were hurting me。 With your magic。 With the collar。’
Tm sorry； Richard。 I was in the spell and didn’t realize what I was doing。 I didn’t intend to hurt you。’
He shook his head。 ‘Not then。 Before。 In the white tower。’
She leaned even closer and gritted her teeth。 ‘You went into a tower？ Are you mad？ I told you what those towers are！ How could you be so 。。。’
‘Sister。 I had no choice。’
‘We have already discussed choice。 I told you how dangerous those towers are。 I told you to stay away from them！’
‘Look； there was lightning all around。 It was trying to strike me。 I 。。。 well； I didn’t know what else to do。 So I dove through an archway； into the tower； for protection。’
‘Can’t you follow the simplest instructions？ Must you always act a child？’
Richard looked up from under his eyebrows。 ‘Those were your exact words。 You came into the tower。 I was sure it was you。 You were angry with me； much as you are now； and you used those exact words。’
He gritted his teeth as he put a finger to the collar at his neck。 ‘You used this。 You used it to throw me against the wall； and pin me there with it。 Can this collar do that； Sister？’
She sat much quieter。 ‘Yes。 We don’t have the power of a wizard； the male Han。 The collar amplifies our power； so we may be stronger than the one wearing it。 So we can teach them。’
His voice was deep with anger。 ‘Then you used it to give me pain； like the pain you did for real； when you were in the spell。 Only it was stronger； and went on and on。 Can the collar do that； too； Sister？’
She pulled a clump of grass to her side and began cleaning her hands with it； avoiding his glare。 ‘Yes。 But that was a vision； Richard。 I wasn’t really doing it。’
‘I told you to stop hurting me or I would put a stop to it。 You wouldn’t stop； so I called the sword’s magic and broke the bond of the power holding me。 You were furious。 You said that I had made my last mistake。 You said you were going to kill me for fighting you。 You were going to kill me； Sister。’
‘I’m sorry； Richard；’ she whispered as she looked up； ‘that you had to suffer that。’ Her voice regained some of its strength。 ‘So； what did you do to me 。。。 to the vision of me？’ He leaned over and touched the edge of his first finger to the side of her shoulder。 ‘I cut you in half with the sword。 Right here。’
Her hands stopped； she was stone still。 Some of the color had left her face。 Finally； she regained her posure。
Richard picked at the clump of grass by his foot again。 ‘I didn’t want to do it； but I was positive you were going to kill me。’
She tossed the grass aside。 ‘I’m sure you were； Richard。 But that was only a vision。 If it were real； it wouldn’t have turned out that way。 You would not have been able to do what you did。’
‘Who are you trying to convince； Sister？ Me； or yourself？’
She met his glare。 The things you saw were not as they are in the real world。 They were simply illusions。’
Richard let it drop。 He turned the stick with the rabbit to cook the other side； and slid the iron plate with the bannock to the side of the fire to let it cool。
‘Anyway； when I saw you again； I didn’t know if you were a vision； or real； but I truly hoped you were alive。 I didn’t want to kill you。’ He looked up and smiled。 ‘Besides； I promised you that you would get through the Valley of the Lost。’
She nodded。 ‘Yes； you did。 More desire than wisdom indeed。’
‘Sister； I was only doing what I could think of to survive。 To help you survive； too。’
She sighed and shook her head。 ‘Richard； I know you’re trying to do your best； but you must understand that what you think is best is not necessarily right。 You’re calling your Han without knowing what you’re doing； or even realizing you’re doing it。 In so doing； you tempt danger you can’t fathom。’
‘How was I using my Han？’
‘Wizards make promises that their Han strives to keep。 You promised me you would help me through the valley …save me。 But in so doing； you have invoked prophecy。’
Richard frowned。 ‘I’ve given no prophecy。’
‘Not only given it； but used your Han without realizing it； used prophecy without knowing its form； to do something in the past to aid you in the future。’
‘What are you talking about？’
‘You destroyed the horses’ bits。’
‘I told you at the time why I did that。 They’re cruel。’
She shook her head。 That’s what I’m talking about。 You think you did it for one reason； but it served another purpose。 Your conscious mind is simply seeking to rationalize what your Han is doing。 When we were running from the valley； I didn’t believe in what you were doing； and I tried to turn my horse。 Because he didn’t have a bit； I was unable to。’
‘So what？’
She leaned closer。 ‘Destroying the bits in the past satisfied a need of a promise in the future。 That was using prophecy。 You’re swinging the axe blindly。’
Richard gave her a skeptical expression。 ‘That’s a stretch； Sister。 Even for you。’
‘I know how the gift works； Richard。’
Richard thought about it； and finally decided he didn’t believe her； but decided； too； that he didn’t want to argue with her about it。 There were other things he wanted to know。
‘Is your little book full？ I haven’t seen you writing in it。’
‘I sent a message yesterday； that we have e through the valley。 I have nothing else to write； that’s all。 The book is magic。 With magic； we erase old messages。 I erased all but two pages； but with what I added yesterday； there are now three pages full。’
Richard tore off a corner of the hot bannock。 ‘Who is the Prelate？’
‘She charges the Sisters of the Light。 She is 。。。’ Her eyes narrowed。 ‘I’ve never mentioned her。 How do you know of her？’
Richard licked the crumbs from his fingers。 ‘I read it in your book。’
Her hand flew to her belt； groping for the book。 It was there； where it always was。 ‘You’ve read my private writing！ You have no right！ I will 。。。’
‘You were dead at the time。’ Her mouth snapped shut； and he went on。 ‘When I killed you； or the illusion of you； the book fell on the ground。 I read it。’
The tension left her muscles。 ‘Oh。 Well； that’s simply part of the illusion。 I told you； it’s not as things are in life。’
Richard tore off another corner of bannock。 ‘There were only two pages with writing； just as the real book。 Not until after we were through the valley did you add the third。 Back then； there were only two。’
She watched him eating the bannock。 ‘Illusion； Richard。’
He looked up。 ‘One page said： ‘I am the Sister in charge of this boy。 These directives are beyond reason if not absurd。 I demand to know the meaning of these instructions。 I demand to know upon whose authority they are given。 …Yours in the service of the Light； Sister Verna Sauventreen。’ The second page said： ‘You will do as you are instructed； or suffer the consequences。 Do not presume to question the orders of the palace again。 … In my own hand； The Prelate。’’
The Sister’s face had drained of color。 ‘You had no business reading something belonging to another。’
‘As I said； you were dead at the time。 What instructions did they give you about me that made you so angry？’
The color came back to her face in a rush。 ‘It has to do with a technicality。 It’s nothing you would understand； and anyway； it is not your business。’
Richard lifted an eyebrow。 ‘Not my business？ You claim you are only trying to help me； yet you’ve taken me prisoner； and you say it’s not my business？ I have this collar around my neck； and with it you can hurt me； perhaps kill me； and you say it is not my business？ You tell me I must do the things you say； that I must take them on faith； even though that faith is shaken with every new thing I discover； yet it’s not my business？ You tell me that the illusion I saw was not as things are in the real world； yet I find it was； and you tell me it’s not my business？’
Sister Verna was silent。 She watched him without emotion。 Watched him； he thought； as if he were a bug in a box。
‘Sister Verna； will you tell me one thing I’ve been wondering about？’
‘If I can。’
He pulled his legs up tighter under himself。 He tried to keep any hostility out of his tone。 ‘When you first saw me； you were surprised that I was grown。 You thought that I would be young。’
That’s right。 We have ones at the palace who can sense one born with the gift。 But you were hidden from us； so it took us a very long time to find you。’
‘But you told me just the other day that you had spent over half your life away from the palace； searching for me。 If you’ve spent twenty