fist to loosen？ It never did； he continued to sit so still it looked like
he wasn't breathing。 What was wrong with him？ Was this his normal
behavior？ I questioned my judgment on Jessica's bitterness at lunch
today。 Maybe she was not as resentful as I'd thought。
It couldn't have anything to do with me。 He didn't know me from Eve。
I peeked up at him one more time； and regretted it。 He was glaring down
at me again； his black eyes full of revulsion。 As I flinched away from
him； shrinking against my chair； the phrase if looks could kill suddenly
ran through my mind。
At that moment； the bell rang loudly； making me jump； and Edward Cullen
was out of his seat。 Fluidly he rose — he was much taller than I'd
thought — his back to me； and he was out the door before anyone else was
out of their seat。
I sat frozen in my seat； staring blankly after him。 He was so mean。 It
wasn't fair。 I began gathering up my things slowly； trying to block the
anger that filled me； for fear my eyes would tear up。 For some reason； my
temper was hardwired to my tear ducts。 I usually cried when I was angry；
a humiliating tendency。
〃Aren't you Isabella Swan？〃 a male voice asked。
I looked up to see a cute； baby…faced boy； his pale blond hair carefully
gelled into orderly spikes； smiling at me in a friendly way。 He obviously
didn't think I smelled bad。
〃Bella；〃 I corrected him； with a smile。
〃I'm Mike。〃
〃Hi； Mike。〃
〃Do you need any help finding your next class？〃
〃I'm headed to the gym； actually。 I think I can find it。〃
〃That's my next class； too。〃 He seemed thrilled； though it wasn't that
big of a coincidence in a school this small。
We walked to class together； he was a chatterer — he supplied most of the
conversation； which made it easy for me。 He'd lived in California till he
was ten； so he knew how I felt about the sun。 It turned out he was in my
English class also。 He was the nicest person I'd met today。
But as we were entering the gym； he asked； 〃So； did you stab Edward
Cullen with a pencil or what？ I've never seen him act like that。〃
I cringed。 So I wasn't the only one who had noticed。 And； apparently；
that wasn't Edward Cullen's usual behavior。 I decided to play dumb。
〃Was that the boy I sat next to in Biology？〃 I asked artlessly。
〃Yes；〃 he said。 〃He looked like he was in pain or something。〃
〃I don't know；〃 I responded。 〃I never spoke to him。〃
〃He's a weird guy。〃 Mike lingered by me instead of heading to the
dressing room。 〃If I were lucky enough to sit by you； I would have talked
to you。〃
I smiled at him before walking through the girls' locker room door。 He
was friendly and clearly admiring。 But it wasn't enough to ease my
irritation。
The Gym teacher； Coach Clapp； found me a uniform but didn't make me dress
down for today's class。 At home； only two years of RE。 were required。
Here； P。E。 was mandatory all four years。 Forks was literally my personal
hell on Earth。
I watched four volleyball games running simultaneously。 Remembering how
many injuries I had sustained — and inflicted — playing volleyball； I
felt faintly nauseated。
The final bell rang at last。 I walked slowly to the office to return my
paperwork。 The rain had drifted away； but the wind was strong； and
colder。 I wrapped my arms around myself。
When I walked into the warm office； I almost turned around and walked
back out。
Edward Cullen stood at the desk in front of me。 I recognized again that
tousled bronze hair。 He didn't appear to notice the sound of my entrance。
I stood pressed against the back wall； waiting for the receptionist to be
free。
He was arguing with her in a low； attractive voice。 I quickly picked up
the gist of the argument。 He was trying to trade from sixth…hour Biology
to another time — any other time。
I just couldn't believe that this was about me。 It had to be something
else； something that happened before I entered the Biology room。 The look
on his face must have been about another aggravation entirely。 It was
impossible that this stranger could take such a sudden； intense dislike
to me。
The door opened again； and the cold wind suddenly gusted through the
room； rustling the papers on the desk； swirling my hair around my face。
The girl who came in merely stepped to the desk； placed a note in the
wire basket； and walked out again。 But Edward Cullen's back stiffened；
and he turned slowly to glare at me — his face was absurdly handsome —
with piercing； hate…filled eyes。 For an instant； I felt a thrill of
genuine fear； raising the hair on my arms。 The look only lasted a second；
but it chilled me more than the freezing wind。 He turned back to the
receptionist。
〃Never mind； then；〃 he said hastily in a voice like velvet。 〃I can see
that it's impossible。 Thank you so much for your help。〃 And he turned on
his heel without another look at me； and disappeared out the door。
I went meekly to the desk； my face white for once instead of red； and
handed her the signed slip。
〃How did your first day go； dear？〃 the receptionist asked maternally。
〃Fine；〃 I lied； my voice weak。 She didn't look convinced。
When I got to the truck； it was almost the last car in the lot。 It seemed
like a haven； already the closest thing to home I had in this damp green
hole。 I sat inside for a while； just staring out the windshield blankly。
But soon I was cold enough to need the heater； so I turned the key and
the engine roared to life。 I headed back to Charlie's house； fighting
tears the whole way there。
===========================================================================
2。 OPEN BOOK
The next day was better… and worse。
It was better because it wasn't raining yet； though the clouds were dense
and opaque。 It was easier because I knew what to expect of my day。 Mike
came to sit by me in English； and walked me to my next class； with Chess
Club Eric glaring at him all the while； that was nattering。 People didn't
look at me quite as much as they had yesterday。 I sat with a big group at
lunch that included Mike； Eric； Jessica； and several other people whose
names and faces I now remembered。 I began to feel like I was treading
water； instead of drowning in it。
It was worse because I was tired； I still couldn't sleep with the wind
echoing around the house。 It was worse because Mr。 Varner called on me in
Trig when my hand wasn't raised and I had the wrong answer。 It was
miserable because I had to play volleyball； and the one time I didn't
cringe out of the way of the ball； I hit my teammate in the head with it。
And it was worse because Edward Cullen wasn't in school at all。
All morning I was dreading lunch； fearing his bizarre glares。 Part of me
wanted to confront him and demand to know what his problem was。 While I
was lying sleepless in my bed； I even imagined what I would say。 But I
knew myself too well to think I would really have the guts to do it。 I
made the Cowardly Lion look like the terminator。
But when I walked into the cafeteria with Jessica — trying to keep my
eyes from sweeping the place for him； and failing entirely — I saw that
his four siblings of sorts were sitting together at the same table； and
he was not with them。
Mike intercepted us and steered us to his table。 Jessica seemed elated by
the attention； and her friends quickly joined us。 But as I tried to
listen to their easy chatter； I was terribly unfortable； waiting
nervously for the moment he would arrive。 I hoped that he would simply
ignore me when he came； and prove my suspicions false。
He didn't e； and as time passed I grew more and more tense。
I walked to Biology with more confidence when； by the end of lunch； he
still hadn't showed。 Mike； who was taking on the qualities of a golden
retriever； walked faithfully by my side to class。 I held my breath at the
door； but Edward Cullen wasn't there； either。 I exhaled and went to my
seat。 Mike followed； talking about an uping trip to the beach。 He
lingered by my desk till the bell rang。 Then he smiled at me wistfully
and went to sit by a girl with braces and a bad perm。 It looked like I
was going to have to do something about Mike； and it wouldn't be easy。 In
a town like this； where everyone lived on top of everyone else； diplomacy
was essential。 I had never been enormously tactful； I had no practice
dealing with overly friendly boys。
I was relieved that I had the desk to myself； that Edward was absent。 I
told myself that repeatedly。 But I couldn't get rid of the nagging
suspicion that I was the reason he wasn't there。 It was ridiculous； and
egotistical； to think that I could affect anyone that strongly。 It was
impossible。 And yet I couldn't stop worrying that it was true。
When the school day was finally done； and the blush was fading out of my
cheeks from the volleyball incident； I changed quickly back into my jeans
and navy blue sweater。 I hurried from the girls' locker room； pleased to
find that I had successfully evaded my retriever friend for the moment。 I
walked swiftly out to the parking lot。 It was crowded now with fleeing