llege and succeed in life。 But the classes they were taking now sounded like a joke。
“Okay；” Serena trailed off uncertainly。 She was used to being the life of the party； but now she felt like that awkward guest who people only talked to out of a sense of obligation。 “Does anyone else need a drink？” she asked； not bothering to wait for an answer。
Serena hugged her arms against her chest as she walked over to the bar。 Didn’t they say that people grew apart after high school？ Maybe it was natural to not have anything in mon once you no longer shared terrible teachers and lunchtime gossip。 She’d fallen out of touch with her actress friends—Alysia was engaged to some B…list actor； Alison was pregnant； and Amanda was in rehab。 Besides； she kind of hated going to Hollywood parties。 The people there only cared about themselves and their careers。 Right now； she’d give anything just to talk to someone who actually knew her。 But the only people who did were her brother Erik； Blair； and Nate。 Erik was spending the holidays in Australia with his girlfriend； Blair hated her； and who even knew if she’d ever see Nate again？ The last she’d heard； Nate was at that same crazy farm school as Chuck。 She’d tried to write him e…mails； but always deleted them before she hit send。 She wanted to tell him she understood why he freaked out last year； but could never find the words。 She wanted to let him know that she was sorry； that she never meant to hurt him； and that it was fine if he never wanted to be together。 But she needed to be friends with him—somehow。 She couldn’t imagine her life without Nate in it。
“Serena！” Kati Farkas cried from the other end of the bar。 “Did you break up with Breckin O’Dell？”
Serena tried to smile。 It was going to be a long evening。
The best ones always are。
Serena took the bottle of Ketel on the bar counter； splashed it liberally in a Riedel glass； then topped it with a thin layer of cranberry juice。 Maybe a drink would help her feel better。 She took an unhappy sip and scanned the room。
Which was when she saw him—all five feet； ten inches of tall； honey gold hair； glittering green…eyed goodness。 He wore a dark blue overcoat and looked out of place in the overheated suite。
Serena held on to the granite bar for support。 Around her L’école girls were passing around a joint and laughing。 She felt like she was going to faint。 She had to talk to him； but what if he didn’t want to talk to her？ Or worse； what if he was just polite？ What if he talked to her like she’d been his high school lab partner？
She drained the rest of her drink and spontaneously threw her arms around his back。 “Happy New Year； Natie！” she yelled into his shoulder blades as if it were the old days； and she’d just seen him a couple hours ago； rather than a whole year。 His body felt stronger than she’d remembered； and she could feel his taut muscles through his shirt。
“Serena；” Nate said dumbly； turning so his face was inches from hers。 He could smell her familiar patchouli…infused essential oil scent； and at first he wondered if this was some very weird reaction to the pot he’d smoked earlier。 Somebody at the party had had a bag of incredible Thai stick and had generously shared it with him。
“How are you？” he finally asked。 It was a dumb and obvious question and not at all what he wanted to say。 He wanted to tell her he was sorry； that he still loved her； that Chips had died and he was high and didn’t even know what to do about it。 He wanted to hold her and never let go。
Serena shrugged and smiled。 Her navy blue eyes looked far away。 “I’m okay。 How are you？”
“I’m… okay；” he said； shifting from one Stan Smith sneaker to the other。 Talk about the understatement of the year。 He wasn’t； not at all。 He was a fucking mess。 But right now； with Serena near him； he felt better than he had in a long time。
“Nathaniel fucking Archibald！”
Nate whirled around。 Towering above him was a guy with a familiar shock of reddish…blond hair。 It was Jeremy Scott Tompkinson； one of his old St。 Jude’s classmates。 Jeremy had always been excessively skinny and only about five foot two； but he’d obviously had a late…adolescent growth spurt in college。 He was huge； massive！ Jeremy was trailed by Charlie Dern and Anthony Avuldsen； who were wearing matching Hamilton College visors perched on the sides of their heads to plement their matching beer guts。
Nate held out a hand and Jeremy； Charlie； and Anthony all slapped it in turn； their customary salute。 Charlie’s eyes bugged beneath his floppy bangs as he took in his old friend。 “I thought you were in； like； the army。”
Close enough。
“Nah； I was in school；” Nate said。 While he was excited to see his old St。 Jude’s buddies； he didn’t really feel like playing catch…up。 How could he explain about sailing the world； about Chips； about what he was up to now？ They probably had no clue what Deep Springs was or what it was really about。 But he knew Serena would get it。 He suddenly wanted to be with Serena； alone。
“Where have you guys been？ Beer Pong State？” Serena easily teased the guys。
Nate cracked a grin； glad that Serena was acting so chill。 She hadn’t grabbed his wrist； dragged him to a corner； and yelled at him for being an asshole。 That was nice。
Nate realized that everyone was looking at him curiously and snapped out of his reverie。 “I know how to milk a cow；” he said randomly。
Congratulations。
“Man； really？” Jeremy asked； his eyes wide。 “So； like； you just squeeze？”
“Well； sort of。” Nate thought back to Juliet； his favorite cow in the barn。 He’d sometimes find himself whispering to her； telling her stories about the day or asking her questions。 He’d always feel reassured when she’d moo back； as if she understood what he meant。 In a way； it was the same way he felt when he was with Serena。 Not like Serena reminded him of a cow； but he didn’t feel nervous or scared or judged when he was with her。 It was nice。
“Really？” Serena asked； grinning as if it was the most amusing thing she’d heard all day。 Nate felt a surge of pride to realize he could still make her smile。 Did that mean she forgave him？
Maybe he should ask his cow what she thinks。
“Yeah。 Her name’s Juliet；” Nate said。 He didn’t really want to talk about cows anymore； but if he wasn’t talking about that； he didn’t know what he’d start babbling about。 Cows seemed like a pretty safe choice。 “She has really long eyelashes and likes to be touched behind the ears。”
Don’t we all？
“Should I be worried？” Serena giggled。 She couldn’t believe she’d been so nervous about talking to Nate。
“Dude； you either got really fucking weird or you have some fucking amazing weed I need to sample immediately。” Anthony wiggled his eyebrows crazily。
“Nah；” Nate replied simply。
“I’m getting some brews。” Anthony turned on his heel； trailed by Charlie and Jeremy。
Nate shook his head dreamily； as if he hadn’t noticed they’d already left。 “I can’t believe you’re here；” he said to Serena。 A stray eyelash sat on her cheekbone。 He gently brushed it away with his index finger before he realized he should have saved it。 When they were little； Serena had taught him to make a wish on an eyelash and then blow it away。
“Did you steal my wish？” Serena asked； tilting her face up toward him。
“I hope not；” Nate whispered huskily as he leaned down to kiss her。
Wish granted。
for auld lang syne
“Are you ready？” Blair fidgeted with the clasp on her Prada clutch while Pete sipped his cappuccino。 It was already eleven o’clock。 They were at Da Silvano on West Fourth for a romantic New Year’s dinner before they headed to the party in the Bass suite。 She couldn’t wait to show off Pete to all her bitchy former Constance classmates—including Serena。 Blair figured she’d be there and planned to act cordial。 After all； it must be hard to be a boyfriendless； confused； washed…up ex–movie star at the tender age of nineteen。
How generous of her。
Blair wore a tight black and silver DVF dress； and Pete’s blond hair flopped adorably into his blue eyes。 In his bright blue Thomas Pink button…down； he made the perfect accessory。
She smiled in satisfaction； trying to stifle a yawn。 She didn’t want to be tired； but it had been a long day。 They’d spent Christmas in LA with her family； and had just gotten to the city this afternoon。 Pete had always wanted to celebrate New Year’s in New York； and Blair was excited to show him where she grew up； especially after spending a week in her family’s tacky Pacific Palisades McMansion。 She couldn’t wait to reexperience all the cheesy romantic things New York had to offer with her boyfriend。 She wanted to go skating at Wollman Rink； take a horse…drawn carriage ride through Central Park while sipping mulled wine out of a thermos； and have drinks at Top of the Rock。 Even though Blair hated cheesiness； she didn’t mind it when she was with Pete。
Aw。
“Ready。” Pete put down his cup and signaled to the waiter for the check。 “So； remind me who I’m going to meet tonight？” He took his AmEx from his worn leather wallet and slipped it in the folder。
“Well； Chuck is hosting the party。 He’s�